Oct. 23, 2010

Me (2:11:03 AM): what's up?
Him (2:11:19 AM): go to sleep!
Him (2:11:23 AM): :/
Me (2:11:30 AM): after you tell me why you looked so blah!
Me (2:11:38 AM): whats wrong?
Him (2:11:53 AM): nothing
Me (2:12:14 AM): you swear on our relationship that nothing is bothering you?
Him (2:12:45 AM): you cant do that
Me (2:12:51 AM): i cant do what?
Him (2:12:58 AM): i gotta do dishes...
Me (2:13:18 AM): is that wht was bothering you or are you not gonna tell me? ;/
Him (2:13:37 AM): i wannaSEE YOU!
Me (2:13:50 AM): is that what is bothering you?
Him (2:14:01 AM): YES
Me (2:14:12 AM): you wanna hang out this weekend?
Him (2:15:39 AM): nhhh
Me (2:16:09 AM): ?
Him (2:16:15 AM): GOODNIGHT!
Me (2:16:27 AM): Hmpf. goodnight (his name).
Me (2:16:32 AM): <3
Him (2:16:55 AM): FALLIN ASLEEP AGAIN!
Me (2:17:16 AM): I wasnt! i was trying to figure out nhhh
Him (2:17:52 AM): IT MEANS no
Me (2:18:05 AM): you dont wanna hang out this weekend?
Him (2:18:20 AM): cuz you dont want to
Me (2:18:32 AM): i dont? when did i say that?
Him (2:18:55 AM): im sure your tired and done with me
Me (2:19:15 AM): what do you mean? (His name) im confused....
Him (2:19:36 AM): arent you done with me
Me (2:19:46 AM): what do you mean?
Him (2:20:23 AM): you dont wanna be with me?
Me (2:21:00 AM): what do you mean i dont wanna be with you? like physically or in a relationship?
Me (2:21:24 AM): Cause i most deff want to be with you in both ways.
Me (2:27:00 AM): (his name)?
Him (2:28:54 AM): babe im sorry
Me (2:29:15 AM): for what? whats wrong? :(
Him (2:29:27 AM): everything.
Him (2:29:44 AM): forbeing tha asshole i am
Him (2:29:53 AM): flirting cheted
Him (2:30:01 AM): bad grades
Him (2:30:06 AM): smoked
Him (2:30:09 AM): drink
Him (2:30:27 AM): im sorry for everyhting
Me (2:30:31 AM): but you havent smoked or drank in a while.
Him (2:30:37 AM): i think too much also
Him (2:30:58 AM): i think your too good for me
Me (2:31:25 AM): You think that i dont want to be with you? like in a relationship? :(
Him (2:31:38 AM): do you?
Him (2:31:45 AM): if so explain why
Me (2:32:18 AM): Yes, because i love you, and i care for you alot!
Him (2:33:52 AM): i love you
Him (2:34:02 AM): just been thinking alot
Me (2:34:14 AM): I love you too. What are you thinking
Him (2:34:22 AM): love
Him (2:34:26 AM): drugs
Him (2:34:36 AM): how im an asshole
Him (2:34:41 AM): cheating
Him (2:34:47 AM): everything!
Me (2:35:36 AM): I love you (His name). Do you doubt that?
Him (2:35:47 AM): no babe i dont
Me (2:36:19 AM): Then why the hell woundnt i want to be in a relationship with you?
Him (2:36:28 AM): do you wanna just leave?
Him (2:36:37 AM): forget about me
Him (2:36:41 AM): im garbage
Him (2:36:51 AM): you desevre gold
Me (2:36:56 AM): :'( stop (his name)
Him (2:37:15 AM): stop what?
Him (2:37:26 AM): this is the question game
Me (2:39:28 AM): Why do you think like that? I could never forget you. I don't ever want to just leave, boy i'm yours. I left a guy with out really giving him a chance. You aren't garbage! Do you think like this all the time and just not express it?
Him (2:39:53 AM): no..
Me (2:40:00 AM): no what.
Him (2:40:26 AM): i dont think like this all the time
Him (2:40:42 AM): hoover? (my nickname lol)
Me (2:40:53 AM): then why now? what made you think...yes?
Him (2:41:10 AM): stay mine
Him (2:41:16 AM): only if you want
Me (2:41:36 AM): I am yours! I want to be your girl.
Him (2:41:48 AM): mr. lumberjack (his nickname haha) wants you!
Me (2:41:58 AM): haha
Him (2:42:18 AM):  so your not leaving me?
Me (2:42:56 AM): Why would you think that (His name)? Of course i'm not leaving you!
Him (2:43:16 AM): yay!
Him (2:43:39 AM): if you want i understand im a flirt and i cant control it
Me (2:44:33 AM): the way you said that makes it seem like you .... You dont want me to. I know that. (His name) i love you.
Him (2:45:04 AM): i dont want you to
Me (2:45:43 AM): you dont want me to what?
Him(2:45:50 AM): i want you to be mine forever'
Him (2:45:58 AM): leave me.
Me (2:46:32 AM): You want me forever?
Him (2:47:27 AM): yes
Him (2:47:56 AM): i gotta do dishes m be home soon
Me (2:48:00 AM): forever is a long time <3
Him (2:48:03 AM): i love you
Me (2:48:06 AM): Haha i love you too.
Him (2:48:14 AM): good night babe
Him (2:48:17 AM): gf
Me (2:48:21 AM): goodnight. please dont think to much
Him (2:48:25 AM): muah!
Me (2:48:30 AM): Muuaahh!
Me (2:48:39 AM): all my kisses are for you.
Him (2:49:14 AM): night my love
Me (2:49:22 AM): :) night


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WELL... first off, a little advice I've heard, and like, and agree with, "You cannot love until you first love yourself." Meaning you like you. You don't think you are worthless, you have some sort of self-esteem.

I can't believe I didn't see you twisting my emotions. I have to get ALL of this out of my system. I can look back now and I can tell how much I've grown from you. You don't understand, you made me cry more than ever, most of the time I never let you know, because I feel weak.